Finding that comfort zone

I do not want to eat outside of the parameters of Whole30. I almost don't know what to do when faced with foods that are not W30 compliant. I continue to plan meals and snacks that are compliant and really don't want to stray. I have found comfort in knowing what's in the food I make, serve, and eat. There's comfort in knowing that what I'm eating won't leave me bloated or feeling badly. There's comfort in knowing that I'll wake up refreshed. It's a good feeling.

We had our annual wine and cheese party on Saturday night. I enjoyed some wine and a spritzer I made, as well as some cheeses and other snacks. I did not sit down with a plate full and gorge myself, I was very much in control of what I was taking in. Being hostess helped, too, because I didn't really have ample time to eat. I did eat lunch that day, just an Italian beef, no bun, so I was not starved and craving snacks.

Sunday was clean up day after a very late night, and I admit that I had some leftover taco dip and some cheeses with crackers. When you're too tired and lazy to cook, that's what happens. Plus, I'm a sucker for a good goat or sheep milk cheese. And brie. With apples. See, it was sort of healthy!

Today I was super tired, but I still made myself eggs and veggies for breakfast. I have bacon, but didn't have the energy to make it this morning. Tomorrow. Yes.

Aside from adding bacon, I don't really see myself changing my breakfast and lunch choices. I'm pretty happy eating as clean as I have been, and I like the way I feel when I do so. As drastic as it sounds, even my coffee hasn't been as satisfying as I thought it would be! After a cup or two in the morning, I'm fine, then I'm looking for my hot tea. I'm not going to argue, I'm going to enjoy it.

This weekend I may try to reintroduce another food/ingredient, but I will have to identify that in a couple of days. For now, I want to continue my focus on maintaining the good feeling of healthy eating. I'm also increasing my water intake this week. A few glasses of wine over the weekend and now I can't get enough water!

Whole30, day 30

Last day. November has felt like it was flying by sometimes, and at other times it felt like December may never come. For breakfast today I'm enjoying green beans, asparagus, sweet potato, and two eggs. For lunch I have leftover compliant sloppy joes, and for dinner we're having leftovers, so I'm going to have salmon and salad. I have olives and red pepper with me to snack on.

If you are considering a Whole30, here are some insights I can offer.
-Really dig deep and think about why you are doing a Whole30. Keep your 'why list' close to you the whole time. As you get closer to the finish line, this will help keep you motivated.
-The holidays are not the right time to do this if it's your first Whole30. You need time, you must be prepared, and the fewer temptations that are around you, the better.
-It's not about what you can't have, it's about what you can have. There is so much food out there waiting to excite you!
-Think positive. If you don't go into this with a positive mindset, it will be more difficult to get through it.
-Try some new recipes before you start. Don't go into a Whole30 thinking you're going to try all new recipes every night. You are going to need to experiment with what works for you based on your lifestyle. I work full time so it's necessary for me to spend time on the weekend prepping for week night meals. Make meals ahead, cut veggies, do what you can on the weekend to save precious time on the week nights.
-Tell the people around you what you are doing. When someone knows you are making changes in your diet, they are apt to help you out and encourage you. This also makes it easier when you attend parties, gatherings, or host people in your home.
-Don't stop at the end of 30 days. I don't mean to eat your whole life Whole30, that's not realistic. What I mean is, don't see this as a quick diet, a 30 day plan that ends and you go right back to your ways. You will learn a lot about what you eat and why, so if you're not ready to make some long-term changes, wait until you are ready.
-I stood at the store once looking for quick snack foods, and quickly realized I was looking at foods that I never eat normally. Don't grab for a food just because it is compliant. Do you *need* it, or are you looking to fill a void or satisfy a craving? Did you eat enough at your last meal? Are you really hungry?
-Drink water.
-You *can* live without coffee. I finally realized that I drink my coffee for the creamer. 30 days without it was not that bad, and I know I purged my body of a lot of sugar, even if you're like me and drink coconut or almond milk creamer instead of the commercial brands.
-You *can* live without alcohol. Honestly, there is clarity in not drinking alcohol. It's pretty awesome, actually.
-You can do this.
-You don't know until you try.

Would I do this again? Hell to the yes. I would probably choose a month where there isn't a major holiday, and when I'm not in high gear training for a race. February comes to mind, as I could begin at the end of January, or go a couple days into March.

One thing to consider if you're thinking about a Whole30 is the end - what do you have going on after your Whole30 ends? Reintroduction is important, you need to go slowly in order to identify how your body handles different foods and ingredients. If you end right before, let's say, Easter, you'll sit down to that meal and unless you prepare, your body just might not enjoy the feast as much as you hope you might.

All that said, I have been drooling in anticipation of a nice cup of coffee tomorrow morning. I can almost taste that warm cup of creamer coffee, feel it in my hands....

Nevermind. Day 30 is here, and I must savor this final day!

That was just a bump in the road, right? Three.more.days.

A summary of my weekend's transgressions:

Thanksgiving - one glass of wine, a splash of Bailey's in post-dinner coffee, a few bites of stuffing
Saturday night - one glass of wine, some summer sausage
Yesterday - a couple fries

I am OK with these. Am I proud? Hell to the no. I did not feel well after the wine and stuffing incident. I learned the art of control, though. It all happened because I wasn't sufficiently prepared. OK, that's mostly a lie. I brought homemade ranch and veggies for an app, I was armed with my sweet potato dish for dinner (which was amazing, BTW), and I went in knowing what I needed to do. Two words - family, Thanksgiving. I was not W30, but, I was not gluttonous as I would have been otherwise.

The wine, well that was a matter of willpower (how do you say no to this?), but I used control! I did not keep on, I stopped. This is something I've always found to be a challenge, but I feel like I've got a handle on it now. I could never have had just a glass of wine before. Probably a problem, but, I can happily limit, or even pass, now.

I am wearing pants today that I haven't been able to fasten in almost a year. The Vera Wang pants I got at Kohl's last winter are now too big for me. I have a clear head, energy, and desire to do things. I could not have gotten all that I got done this weekend if I'd not cleared my mind and body like I have.

I've had some of the best running in November. It's wonderful run after a good night sleep, to not be bloated, for my running tights to actually fit. I haven't talked myself out of a single run due to a headache, sore gut, or fatigue. I feel good, and I feel good running. Yeah!

I have formed new relationships with food. I have developed new ways of thinking about eating, cooking, and the 'why' behind it all. I am slowly learning what makes me feel good, and what drags me down. I will continue to learn as I reintroduce foods post-Whole30, and beyond.


Three days left. Thursday morning I get my Dunkin' french vanilla with coconut milk creamer, though, and that's helping me out this last few days.

Day 21, Interlude day - nine.more.days....

There are nine days left in this Whole30. Nine.days.left. It feels odd to be saying that when all month long it's felt more like a month left every day. The end is near. It's almost bittersweet. I'm settling in to the point where I almost wonder how to eat any other way. Well, let's not get wild. I am really looking forward to my morning coffee and coconut milk creamer, and the ultimate pay off - a glass of wine. For now, though, I've found some new recipes and love what I've made, and I enjoy looking for new stuff to make and I look forward to eating it.

I'm not ready for a summary just yet, but I can say these few things about the process so far:

• Overall bloating is way down. It's incredible how used to being bloated we get without realizing it.
• My watch is loose on my wrist. See above point.
• Prosciutto. Need I say more?
• Sleep is sooooo much better. Without the uppers (coffee) and downers (alcohol) to fuel the daily duel, it's amazing how good sleep can be. Except, of course, if your cat sleeps on your head like mine does. 
• Steamed brussels sprouts. Who knew?
• I have so much more energy. Wow.

Two tidbits I do have at this stage, however, should help you decide if fall is a good time for you to try a Whole30.

1. There is a reason they don't encourage you to do a Whole30 at/around the holidays. One word - Thanksgiving.
2. Fall time change. Yikes. I hadn't anticipated my changing energy levels in conjunction with the time change. It's midnight before I leave work at 4:30PM.

Tidbits and challenges aside, I truly enjoy the way I'm feeling and the way my clothes fit me now. I look forward to getting things accomplished on weekends because I know I won't be dragging in the morning from eating like crap the night before or having too many glasses of wine.

Nine more days. No biggie, right?

Smack dab in the middle

Day 16
Right now I really want to sit down with a glass of wine and a big chocolate chip cookie.

In reality, I'm eating grapes the size of my thumb, drinking lemon green tea, and trying to hold off eating my almonds.

More than half way there. Exactly two weeks left.

Day nine observations

A couple things I'm noticing already:

My watch is loose on my wrist. It's been on the same hole as always, but, it's looser. Can't get down to the next hole, but this is a nice thing to notice.

Belly bloat is way down. I didn't expect this as much, so I guess I was really bloated and not just fat in that area. I'm not doing any bikini photo shoots by any means, but this is a nice thing to see.

Sleep is so much better. I'm not up as much during the night as I had been. The exception being the other night when a coyote called out at 2:30am. Last night, though, I slept all night long, all the way through to my alarm.

I'm more able to get things done around the house. I have more energy! Evenings this week have been tough, I admit, with the time change and all. I am ready for bed by 8PM. I think that exercise may help this and now that I'm past the first week of W30, I'll get back to the fitness center and get my body moving. Tomorrow night will be the first of these nights. I hope.

Today I want nothing but to dive into a candy bar. I am drinking lots of ginger tea, eating my 4oz. of raw nuts that I brought, and drinking water like a boss.

I can do this.

Week one down, 22 days to go

An easy start to day 8

One week down, only three more to go. Easy enough, right? Not so fast. This is far from easy.

On day one, I had a rush of panic in the middle of the morning. My brain flipped out. Not sure what the problem was. It's not like I've been snacking, eating crap, or binging for any recent period of time, but, knowing that those things are not part of the next 30 days really set in. Day one ended without a cheat or fumble, and all was well with the world.

The World Series happening on days one and two certainly didn't help me, but, I didn't let it derail the train. Luckily for my W30, I'm not a stress eater, rather, I can't eat. My stomach was in knots until Saturday, day five, so any thought of snacking or non-compliant cravings was really a non-issue. I even survived the downtown parade and celebration without even a coffee or adult beverage. How? I honestly don't know, but, my mental game is totally in check at this point.

Go Cubs go!!

 The #1 question I got about my Whole30 at a party on Saturday night was, "Why?". Why am I doing this? Why November? Why not in January? My answers sort of surprised even me. I don't think I'd truly thought too much about the 'why' of it all. Sure, some weight loss and feeling better were benefits, but, really......why?

Why am I doing this?
I want to feel better. I want to learn more about how my body reacts to different things I eat, so I know what causes my bloating, fatigue, and what impacts my ADD symptoms. I want to break some bad habits. It's been over three years since I did my first Whole30, and I've gotten off track with my good eating since then, developing some pretty bad habits in that time. I drink too much too often, and I make poor choices when I am hungry.

Why November?
I've spent the better part of a year now trying to get myself to put my fitness and health first. There is never a "good time". Initially, we didn't have much planned during November. I have mentally prepared myself to do this for a couple of months. We are home more now that it's fall, and I'm able to spend more time cooking and developing better habits regarding what I cook. I knew that by the time Ethel's birthday party weekend (19th) and actual birthday (26th) rolled around, I'd be well into the swing of things, and on my way to the finish line. I am confident that at Thanksgiving, I can handle myself, as well. I know that I can bring a side dish, then I will have turkey and my side, and any veggies or fruit that are there, and I'll be fine. I'm really not intimidated by Thanksgiving this year.

As for the question of why now, why not after the first of the year -
Starting in January seems much harder to me. After the gluttony that surrounds the holidays, it seems that it would take quite a bit more effort to adjust to things like not having my coffee, not having any wine with dinner, and not enjoying some of the treats I might otherwise reach for. I need to reset my mindset. I need to go into the holidays feeling good to start with, not feeling like I'm tired, unable to focus, and run down. With SAD season in full swing, it's also imperative that I keep those negative food influences to a huge minimum. I just felt like if I don't do this now, I know I'll continue on the path I've been on, and will be farther away from my overall fitness and health goals. I want to lose some weight and feel better in my own skin. I've been miserable for way too long.

I'm on day 8, and after a whirlwind weekend, I'm feeling pretty good. Days 6-7 are said to be the days your body wants nothing more than a nap. Well, we just had the fall time change, so mornings are a little easier for the next few days. The evenings and nights are when it's going to be tough. I was ready for bed at 7:30 the other night. After working all day today, tonight should be rather interesting. Today I feel as if I might have lost a little weight. I do see less bloat in my belly, and I do feel "lighter". I feel better. I know it will get worse before it gets better, and I'm just glad that's going to hit during the week rather than on the weekend. I have less access to eating crappy when I'm at work than I do at home.

I really feel that I'll come out better on the other side of this 30 days. It's not rocket science. This isn't an impossible mission. This is a change, one that I needed to make for myself. I am happier waking up not feeling bloated, tired, and unfocused. And now that the World Series is over, I can get back to my normal evening routines and normal bed time!

It's only 30 days, right?

Halloween has now come and gone and I only ate two pieces of chocolate and a sip of wine. I wasn't able to snap any pictures of the kids in their costumes, a term loosely used this year, and I have no solid excuse. Last year was the first year we didn't go trick or treating as a family. Ethel decided she wanted to go with a friend, and it was the strangest feeling not having her with us. This year she repeated the trend, and we took Fred around our neighborhood. Last year his friends came around and we were able to organize a small posse. This year, he passed one friend and one came to the door later in the evening, but, none to walk the rounds with. We did get to walk with some neighbors and their lovely 16 month old, whom I also did not capture in a picture. Clearly I was off my picture taking game.

I did get this lucky shot of One Eyed Pete. Ethel removed both cats' collars so they could be stray cats for Halloween.

While Ethel, the unicorn, was out with friends, we were out with Fred, the hockey player. He skated around and eventually took a spill and wanted to go home. The magic just wasn't there for us this year, which was fine with me. Ethel, of course, still made candy collecting a sport and duly noted her triumph over Fred in the contest that wasn't a contest. For the first year in recent memory (well, 12 years for us), the weather was wonderful and walking around with the kids was actually pleasant. I did agree to a Butterfinger and some peanuts M&Ms, and a sip of wine from our lovely neighbors. They have learned well from my example, carrying on the "Drink and Treat" tradition that I started when Ethel was a wee one. Well done, neighbor!

Today I embark on my second Whole30. I am not going this one alone, I have two girlfriends along with me for this 30 day ride. We have already exchanged some day one words of encouragement, and we still like each other. We all know what we're in for, and have agreed not to take personally any negativity that any of us may spew between now and November 30th. We are all excited about feeling better, running better, and hopefully dropping a few pounds. 

Can I charge this guy rent?

 What better way to start your day than hearing, "Mommy, why is there a HUGE mosquito on your wall???"? The morning rush is fun enough, why not add a massive bug in the bedroom to the mix?

Despite the large insect in my room, I was able to squeeze out my breakfast and lunch for the day and get them packed. I've fallen for brussels sprouts over the past couple of years. No, it's not chocolate, but, I am not repulsed by them. If that doesn't sell you on trying them, I don't know what will. Anyway, breakfast is a simple combo of sprouts, slaw, red onion, and some diced chicken. Lunch is a Greek salad with tuna. That one I'm super excited to have later on!

I am on day six without coffee. Have you seen me on the news? No, you haven't. There, see? If I can do it, you can do it! I'm adding new focus to hot tea, which I usually enjoy in the winter anyway. The warmer fall we're having is making it a little harder to get into the hot drink spirit, but, I'm managing. Some peppermint tea to start the day is actually a bit refreshing.

My biggest difficulty is around 2:30 in the afternoon when I'm at work. That post-lunch food coma triggers my brain to want to eat everything crunchy and salty that it can find. It's the darndest thing. I've succeeded in beating the beast for the last two or three work days, so I'm pretty sure it's going to be OK. I've got a Larabar to help in case of emergency. Water, water, water.

Don't get used to the pictures or any sort of daily updates. Day one I'm still happy and feel encouraged. My next update may be hateful and angry. You've been warned.

You have to start somewhere

I plan our dinners two weeks at a time. I have tried many methods to this madness, as it can be monotonous to keep writing menus for four people with vastly different tasted and preferences. I don't really plan breakfasts and lunches, as I do my own breakfast, the kids eat cereal every weekday morning, and Hot Dad doesn't generally eat breakfast. The kids pack their own lunches for school, Hot Dad usually buys fast food or something, and I pack leftovers, salads, or whatever I can whip up at 0'dark:30 in the morning before work.

This weekend I planned out my two week menu and grocery list so that I would be prepared when I begin this Whole30 next week. I'm gently phasing out my morning coffee, and by next Tuesday I'll be at least four days coffee-free. My biggest challenge right now is the World Series. I've never in my lifetime had to worry about sports in October taking over any aspect of my life, but now the CHICAGO CUBS ARE IN THE WORLD SERIES. Holy mother of pearl. Let's just hope that we don't need those last two games. Please.


While this isn't a huge challenge in the great big picture of life, it just seems contradictory to celebrate or toast the big game (and a big victory) with peppermint tea or a big glass of ice water. I'm fine with the no alcohol part of this whole thing, overall, but, come on, THE CUBS ARE IN THE WORLD SERIES!! If ever there was a test of my willpower, this will be it. No wine. No Old Style. No.booze.at.all. During the World Series. This makes Thanksgiving look like a drop in the Whole30 bucket.

I guess that the World Series isn't my *only* challenge over this 30 day time. I had already accounted for Thanksgiving, but, that one is pretty easy in the grand scheme of things. One day, one big meal, I just planned to come prepared with a side that I can enjoy along with the turkey. Done.

Have you ever decorated a Christmas tree? Are we friends on Facebook? If you answered yes, have you ever wanted to "unfriend" me over Thanksgiving weekend while I spend the weekend dealing with two cats, two kids, two trees, and a zillion stupid lights that only burn out after I've woven them into the branches of the tree(s)? Have you? Do you know how many bloody marys that weekend demands? How many bottles of wine it takes to get through each evening before the tree is finally done and the house looks more like a home than a battlefield of Christmas crap? This is the part that I hadn't taken fully into account when I chose November as my magic month. Decorating for the holidays. November is quickly proving to be a tough time for this undertaking. But I'm up for it. I am.

Want to know why I'm up for it? Because regardless of when it happens, change is hard. There isn't a single month when there isn't *something* going on, and if I wanted until a month without something going on, I would be waiting for the rest of my life. Because I have to shake things up in order to get my brain fully in the game. There's no time like the present.

It begins, for me, one week from today. I am ready. I am excited to be trying some new recipes this week and next. I am excited to start feeling better. I am excited for more energy, to lose a few pounds, and to establish some new habits. I'm excited. I'm ready. GO CUBS!!!!